Here one day, gone one night...

Guess the "emo season" just HAD to roll around when Michael Jackson's memorial service came to town. I found myself waiting for 1 a.m. to arrive, and had time to surf 3 different channels before settling on one to watch the entire service from. (CNN won.)

I was dry-eyed when I saw with my own eyes the casket bearing the body, draped in red roses. Any pretense of his being alive, or more like, "re-lived", flew out the window when you realize that he really was gone. I was calm.

Until the camera panned across to the other Jackson brothers and I caught a glimpse of the single sequined glove they each wore, in his honour.

Then Jermaine sang "Smile" while fighting back his tears.

And if that wasn't enough, Usher did a totally heartfelt, gut-wrenching rendition of "Gone Too Soon" while walking to the casket, and in doing so, struggled to finish the song... one so aptly, hauntingly, written for a HIV-AIDS victim, and now sung for his own goodbye. I still cannot watch the performance without tears streaming down my face.

I didn't expect to cry during the memorial. To see the pain that his family and close friends were going through in this phase of separation, to know that he made the impact he did... it makes you weep at the loss of such a beautiful soul on this side of heaven.

And yet, the entire service also made me smile, it did. It made me beam because people recalled his fun-loving streak, and his love to make people laugh.

What struck me most was that everyone agreed, Michael Jackson truly gave his best. In everything: song, dance, community care. He gave his best.

Not just money, mind you, but more importantly his time with the poor, the needy. He used his position to take time to be with the policy-makers to help change the world. He started with the man in the mirror, and didn't stop there - he tried to get us all into it too, to care for one another, to love a fellow brother and sister.

Eulogizers hoped and prayed and believed that MJ would be in heaven. We pray too that God will have mercy on his soul.

I'm inspired by his life. Not only because he was a pioneer ahead of his time, a tireless entertainer, a fun-loving character. Not only because he was a great humanitarian, the Guinness record-holder for being the "pop star supporting the most number of charitable organizations."

I'm inspired by the simple fact that he simply did his best. You have fought the good fight, MJ. Rest in peace, and may you find eternal delight and joy in your Creator.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

There'll only be one King of Pop

Yeah he was weird.

And quirky.

And unsure of himself sometimes.

So yeah he was not everyone's cup of tea.

Critics denounced his lyrics, his dance moves, his everything.

But no one can deny that there was no other musician and entertainer as great, talented, and genuine as Michael Jackson. We all know he was thrust into the limelight since he was 11 years old - forced to mature at a tender age. It's uncanny, somehow, that as he grew older, he also became more childlike in demeanour.

Therein belied his tendency to make himself vulnerable to the world through his songs. He was unafraid to express everything he felt: joy, sorrow, hurt, anger. This was a guy that embraced the breadth of his emotions, and gave each of them a voice; it was a "take-it-or-leave-it, it's-all-me" act everytime. He gave his best in every instance - it showed in every concert, every music video.

Amidst all the groundbreaking dance moves, the high-pitched "hee-hee" and other mannerisms, I admire Michael Jackson most because he dared to bare his soul to us all. At the end of the day, like everyone else, he just wanted to be loved for everything that he was. The outpouring of love at his death from fans worldwide more than encapsulates the extent to which he impacted the people with his songs.

It takes a truly brave person to show his strengths and weaknesses, and beg to be loved for who he is. The one who loves is surely loved in return. We will always remember you, Michael. Thank you for your gift, for who you are.

In my darkest hour

In my deepest despair

Will you still care

Will you be there

In my trials

And tribulations

There are doubts

And frustrations

In my violence

And the turbulence

To my fear, and my confessions

In my anguish and my pain

To my joy and my sorrow

In the promise of another tomorrow

I'll never let you part

for you are always in my heart

~~ "Will You Be There," Michael Jackson, 2006

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Fly high, you

Hey kiddo,


What a journey! To see you grow up and mature in the past few years has been such a joy! To be alongside you and see your various talents bloom... to watch you navigate the meandering paths of life... to sit and talk to you and realize that there's so much more to you than meets the eye... Everything about you has been a joy!


I count it a privilege to share in your life, to know you the way I have in recent years; you're such a blessing to so many of us.


Am glad that you're on your way into writing another chapter in your life... You have so much potential to reach greater heights (pun intended)... I realize that this too could be a step towards greater self-discovery... and I pray that you will know, deep down, just how unique you are in our eyes, in God's eyes.


We want nothing more than for you to attain the highest peaks you possibly can, to stretch your talents to the limit, to be happy. We pray for nothing more than for you to walk in His footsteps, to hear His heartbeat, to find your peace in His arms.


Take care kiddo. Will see you very soon.



~ J/Jie

p.s. - The pix is not out of place, I didn't realize you were waving til a few moments ago...

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Give the small ones a chance

Small kids.
Small ideas.
Small companies.

They all deserve a chance too. They wanna grow too; and they can't do it alone.

I recall very vividly a relative that practically wrinkled her nose and said to me, "You always have a knack for finding these small companies, don't you?" (She probably doesn't remember that remark now, but help me, I still do, after all these years.)

Yes, even I've heard it all before - big companies mean greater stability, greater perks, greater this and that. Fair enough, I say, they have deep coffers to pick out and dole out goodies from.

But even big companies today started small, didn't they? I mean, logically...

I've worked in small-medium enterprises for the most part of my 8-year work stint thus far. Both shed light on the do's and don'ts of business dealings; I may not have seen it all, but I think I've gleaned some insights in various things - dealing with nice/difficult clients, competent/lousy suppliers, helpful/bribeworthy officials, inculcating teamwork, facing-off competition, (and being COPIED by them!), crossing hurdles, facing stumbling blocks, strategizing furiously, hitting back, emerging victorious.

I guess I'm also blessed to be working with a superior who recognizes work and rewards accordingly. That has made everything quite bearable; even the most stressful periods.

I wish I could tell the graduates and would-be graduates that working for the SMEs can be rewarding too. That the end-to-end experience really does give you that bird's eye-view of things. That some places DO match (or pay higher) than the MNC equivalent. That by being part of a SME, you are in position to play a pivotal role in its journey to become the market leader, the regional player.

Give it a chance, will ya? It's not all that bad.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I've survived!

Yes, Jules has survived another season of 'giving birth' to my Annual Report babies - the weeks of poring over every minute (and I really mean minute) detail, making almost non-stop phone calls to designers, going for client meetings ready to defend the placement of every word and graphic... hounding the delivery guys when they fail to arrive before the 5pm deadline, trying to pacify the client, keeping my frustration in check when the books arrive 2 hours after the promised time....

Gosh. Put it that way, I wonder how I've done it thus far.

With God's help I'm sure.

More than once this season I had to commit my day to the Lord the moment I woke up, because only He could work things out for me. I had to pray for Him to allow me to rest fitfully and without any nightmares so that I'd be alert the next morning. I had to say out loud, "Lord I need a breakthough," when the doors slammed in my face. On many occasions I refused to give in to panic although I was buckling under the load. This season was really tough; really really tough.

In many ways these seasons teach us a lesson about our limits - when to stop, when to give in, and when to look up. My mistake is that I always think I can do it - when I put my mind to it. These seasons taunt me - can you really?

Then my answer comes, in the final moments just before I drift off to sleep - the realization that God has enabled me to accomplish the things I did, and the reality of His control in each day. I was - I am - grateful to be able to call upon a living God for breakthrough. I called, and He answered me.

My smile in early June is oft one of immense relief, and more importantly, of joy. Thank You God for being my reason.

=)

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------