The threat of Overexpecting

What is the true value of a person?
As indicated by the integrity of his word; that if spoken, it will be so.

Through the years of dealing with people, I've learnt various traits of myself. One of it is that I don't like being disappointed, made to feel cheated or let down. When that happens, I find myself delusioned, unable to move on, and sometimes, unable to trust. It eats into me, gnaws into my heart, shakes the very foundation of my being. More often than not, it usually leads me to walk away and remove myself from the source of that hurt.

I have found that oftentimes it is better for me to not be enticed by remuneration or reward, but to find joy in everything I put my hand into, and be pleased with the end result. In this way, whatever acclaim received is an additional joy, and I then truly appreciate the little and big rewards following it.

One might say I'm doing it wrong; that the right way is to begin with the end in mind.

I am. The end I'm looking for is end-user satisfaction and overall good; not so much for personal recognition and acclaim.

I fear the day that I discover I've thought too highly of myself, and overexpected a reward. That's just not me. I'm not made that way. I don't want to think I deserve anything. It's just my way of making sure my ego is not inflated. Let me be. Don't let me overexpect; I don't like walking away.