It's not easy to be me

For one thing, I am woman. That means I am prone to mood swings, which are heightened during PMS, when my words go through my mouth faster than through my brain. It also means I have a bitchy side to me... I believe all women have the capacity to be so; it's just whether we choose to harness it or otherwise.

And then there's the musician part of me. The one that is influenced by my wider emotional range... For me, the line blurs as to which influences whom... Do I play the way I do because I'm emotional naturally, or am I emotional because I'm so in touch with it on a regular basis through my music?

Temperamental. Eccentric. Quirky.
Musical. Wacky. Nuts (and proud to be).
Emotional. Trying not to be. Can't afford to be.

Do you think I like me this way? Not quite. Not at all, in fact. If you think you're disappointed in me, think about how disappointed I am with myself.

Sometimes I wish I wasn't so aware of my failings. "FAIL" is my four-letter F-word. Sometimes I wish I wasn't born the way I was. It's just not easy to be me.

"I may be disturbed... I'm not crazy, or anything."

Bring It On!

I am entering my busiest season for the year at work, and despite the enormous loads ahead, I'm relishing the prospect of workin' my heart out and doin' my best... Which probably explains why Steven Curtis Chapman's words simply jump out at me...

I didn’t come lookin’ for trouble

And I don’t want to fight needlessly

But I’m not gonna hide in a bubble

If trouble comes for me

I can feel my heart beating faster

I can tell something’s coming down

But if it’s gonna make me grow stronger then…

Bring it on

Let the lightning flash, let the thunder roll, let the storm winds blow

Bring it on

Let the trouble come, let the hard rain fall, let it make me strong

Bring it on

Now, maybe you’re thinkin’ I’m crazy

And maybe I need to explain some things

‘Cause I know I’ve got an enemy waiting

Who wants to bring me pain

But what he never seems to remember

What he means for evil God works for good

So I will not retreat or surrender

Now, I don’t want to sound like some hero

‘Cause it’s God alone that my hope is in

But I’m not gonna run from the very things

That would drive me closer to Him

So bring it on

Bring it on

Let the lightning flash, let the thunder roll, let the storm winds blow

Bring it on

Let the trouble come, let it make me fall on the One who’s strong

Bring it on

Let the lightning flash, let the thunder roll, let the storm winds blow

Bring it on

Let me be made weak so I’ll know the strength of the One who’s strong

Bring it on

Bring it on

He who entrusts me with the tasks He has placed onto my shoulders will also be the One who carries me through. This I believe with my whole heart. Lord, Your will be done.

Pace, and brace

Their lives, from the 7th year till the day of battle, were centred around one purpose: being a Spartan warrior. From this they never wavered, never compromised, never quivered. Each day was spent pacing themselves, being readied for the day when they would go to battle.

Pace, and brace.

Outnumbered they were, but not hopeless. Implementing the right strategy was the first rule, and they stuck to it. Even when the Persians were right upon them, they doggedly stuck to the gameplan; courageous, as one unit. Each man protected the other with his shield, there was to be not a chink in the impenetratable collective armour.

Pace, and brace.

"Hold your ground!!" the general urged. So they did. While the Persians tripped on one another, the Spartans stood, their feet firmly on the ground, holding up steadfast against the thronging army.

Pace, and brace.

"PUSH!!!" the Spartan leader shouted. With one mighty "Whoosh!" they pushed in unison, literally lifting Persian army off their feet. The Spartan army - mighty Spartans, brave Spartans - set upon them easily; claiming victory after victory.

Pace, and brace.

The 300 Spartans taught me a good lesson. And the lesson was that fighting well wasn't about fighting all the time, not about giving your all every minute you're on the battlefield. One needs to adequately prepare oneself, then set the pace, and thereafter brace for the challenge.

Mighty Spartans, brave Spartans. Thank you.

Death, anyone?

Have you ever been so angry that you can't see straight? And created desktop pix just to say 2 words you wish you could say to their faces:

I guess it's just as well that I've never learnt to curse, because if I have.............